This is something i've ben working on...what do you think of it. (easy 10pts)?

The Union Aerospace Corporation is the largest corporate entity in existence originally focused on weapon and defiance contracts but new ventures have expanded into Biological research space exploration and other scientific endeavors with unlimited funds and the ability to engage in research out side of moral and legal obligations the UAC has the most advanced technology ever conceived…





With this said the story could start. It goes like this…a young man by the name of Jeffrey Nadole applied for a job as a security guard in Delta Labs for the UAC he got the job a week later and had to take a shuttle to UAC’S city on Mars on March 7 2145 wile he was on board he over heard two men talking to each other he heard “I’m sick and tired of running damage control every time he makes a mess” “ya…you’re the control and if that fails I’m the damage” “if that’s what it takes Betruger is going to start doing things are way” come to find out that was Coinsures Elliot Swan and his body guard a few hours latter he got off the shuttle and checked in at the security check point and was checked for alcohol guns and any disease he passed and checked in at reception were he was given a PDA (Personal Data Assistant) and a pistol after that he reported to Sergeant Kelly Were he was given his objective which was to find a missing scientist that was last seen in delta labs so Jeffery went off looking for the scientist when he came to the the Delta Labs main processing center he found a young chine’s gentlemen he seemed quite fumbled and worried Jeffery asked what was wrong the chine’s gentlemen pressed the play button on the T.V. there was when Jeffery entered DOOM the T.V. showed people screaming, dying, security shooting at monsters, and radios cracking then evil laughing filled the room Sergeant Kelly came over the radio “Were under attack by an unknown life form everybody forward to their last known R.P… Jeffery heard some familiar voices he thought trying to think where he heard the voices before then it clicked Coinsures Elliot Swann “Dang it DR. Betruger why this” “well the UAC doesn’t want to listen to me so they can suffer by the way I like their screams” now Jeffery knew he was behind this the door opened some one shot, Jeffery drew his gun and shot back the zombie fell back dead Jeffery examined the body it was all cold except for the fresh warm blood Jeffery hoped to eventually meet up with Coinsures Elliot Swan Jeffery walked out of the room as he walked down the hall someone jumped out of a room he shot it skimmed Jeffery’s neck as Jeffery grabbed his neck he shot the zombie strait in the throat he fell dead in his tracks Jeffery crawled over to the dead body and looked at his gun he chuckled and said no wonder it’s a dang shotgun he picked it up reloaded it and put the pistol in his holster soon he came to a half dead Security Guard he was bleeding all over and was trying to say something Jeffrey crouched down next to him after awhile he figured out what he was trying to say he was trying to say “keep going leave me here try to kill DR. Betruger there are a lot of unnatural things in this whole UAC center remember DR. Betruger NEED’S to be DEAD” “ok I’ll make sure sir’’ “the name is Stephan” then he coughed and died Jeffery stood up and saw a gray eight eyed creature it screamed in a very high pitch tone it threw a plasma ball Jeffery ducked and shot the creature twice with the shotgun the creature fell dead and to Jeffery’s surprise the body disintegrated into red ashes Jeffery checked the Security Guard’s body again to make sure that he didn’t just faint but he was dead Jeffery continued down the hall of blood and dead scientist Jeffery new it was a long way home he came back to reception blood was every were on the wall’s on the desk’s on the floor and on the ceiling Jeffery threw up it also smelt as bad as it looked he took the service elevator up to the Administration office when he got out of the elevator he heard Swann’s voice again he was on the digital phone talking to DR. Betruger again “I’m telling you DR. this is out of control the UAC is taking over this operation” “Operation is that what their calling it now and its not out of control Swann you are you and your buddy will be taking care of nothing understand” “yes DR. I believe I do understand” then he heard his body guards voice “ok time for plan B” then one of the doors in front of him opened some one shot he shot back and continued walking to the door another one of the plasma creature’s came out of an office it had blood on its face Jeffery shot it twice again it’s body disintegrated like before after a day of blood violence and screams of the helpless people DR. Betruger came over Jeffery’s radio he said “Jeffery you are slowly but surely getting On my nerves but soon you shall die and your soul will go strait to hell like the others before Jeffery had a chance to respond he was off the radio Jeffery walked around a corner he saw a dead body


Laying next to a PDA he picked it up he took the memory stick out of it and put it in his it downloaded it was Duncan Mathews his PDA flashed security clearance updated he found a locked office


He pressed the enter button on the key pad screen of the locked door it said in proper security clearance people listed on file Alex Nodar and Duncan Mathews so he scanned the PDA the door opened the office was perfectly clean while the rest of the Administration floor was all blood and dead people he was thinking about hiding in the office and locking the door but he had direct orders that he had to obey then again all he had to do was shoot his radio so Sergeant Kelly couldn’t contact him and that would make Kelly think he’s dead but Jeffery would prefer if he could stay in contact not just with Kelly but with anyone still alive so he left the office he walked down a long hall of blood and hell he came to a platform were he could look down stairs threw glass he looked down were he saw Elliot trying to access a control station on a computer Jeffery shot his gun a few times to get their attention but the glass was sound proof so Jeffery ran down stairs shot the lock out on the door to the control station ran down the hall ran threw the door that said control station but Elliot and his body guard were gone still Jeffery was alone on Mars Jeffery was about to go insane and pull his hair out until he bled to death but Jeffery felt there was still hope in his life so he wouldn’t give up yet at least not write know he thought for a wile what if he sent a message over his PDA to Elliot he wondered if he would get it or not but it was worth try so he took out his PDA and typed the message then pressed send right as he put his PDA down he saw a small squad of marines running he shouted they stopped and ran over to him one took out a needle and injected it into his neck every thing went blank when he woke up he was surrounded by fire and those plasma creature’s when he looked up he saw a man in brown pant’s a white dress shirt and a white lab coat he said “its about time we meet up face to face I am DR. Betruger now that we Know each other I can personally send you to hell” right as he was about to order the plasma creatures to kill him a loud high pitch shock wave pierced threw the room then it glowed green for a few seconds when Jeffery looked up again he saw Elliot standing next to his body guard his body guard had a grin on his face as his odd looking gun smoked then they turned away and walked down the hall Jeffery was extremely happy for some reason and not just because he survived probably because he knew that Elliot Swann was a good person then he noticed that DR. Betruger was gone not dead but just not there all the creatures that were around him disintegrated like they usually did Jeffery was hoping that Elliot Swann was waiting for him on the upstairs platform but as he ran around the corner of the stairs he saw a plasma creature eating a dead persons body it stood up blood dripping down its face peaces of the persons face were stuck in between his teeth Jeffery almost got sick he was right about to shoot it right when it threw a plasma ball it hit right in front of Jeffery it knocked a metal floor tile off the floor it bounced up and knocked the gun out of his hands he grabbed the pistol out of his holster he lade off 12 shots then the creature finally died he dropped the clip out there were no bullets left Jeffery reloaded the gun then picked up the shot gun and continued running towards the stairs he came to the stairs he ran as fast as he could up them he made it just in time to see a person walk around the corner he ran around the corner he saw the person but it wasn’t Elliot but the person didn’t look evil but nether did the small squad that injected him but Jeffery was willing to take the chance he said “hey you” the person jumped he started to tremble he had blood all over his shirt but it wasn’t his blood he said “please don’t hurt me I tried to save him but he was beyond help he was as good as dead when I found him” “found who” “Elliot” “Elliot who” “Elliot ehhhh Elliot Tonkins” “not Elliot Swann” “no not him I wish it was those two UAC operatives don’t give a dang about any body” they care about me they just saved me back there” “they did” “ya why don’t we stick together” “sounds good” they walked down a long hallway of dead people and people that were beyond help then sergeant Kelly came over the radio saying there was some unidentified growth taking over the base he came to a door that was locked it had another PDA security lock the guy that he was with said it was the door to alpha labs 1 that’s were Jeffery needed to go all the other doors just led around the administrators office he walked up a set of stairs he saw something that looked like a giant worm crawling around the area he shot it the bullets went threw it but the skin just covered the holes back up he walked around it he saw a room with a PDA in it he walked over to it and put the memory card into his as soon as he was done a bunch of plasma creatures surrounded him one swatted at the person with him he went flying into the wall and died instantly Jeffery a little angry started shooting randomly then suddenly the room filled with evil laughter over the announcement speakers even though Jeffery was in extraordinary pain that just gave him the endurance to fight threw but when he was finished Jeffery collapsed to the floor in pain and agony from all the fighting he noticed that he was holding his neck from were the bullet skimmed him so he crawled over to a dead persons body and ripped a piece of his lab coat off with a scalpel he found in his lab coat he rapt the cloth around his neck then before he knew it he was asleep about 12 hours later he woke up he felt completely better except for a slight headache and a few bruises on his as arms and legs so he stood up and walked to the door that said delta


Labs on it and scanned his PDA the door opened there was another reception area a little fancier than the one in Mars City the lights weir flickering on and off the door out of reception was locked Jeffery walked over to the desk computer he heard some groaning around the corner Jeffery walked over around the corner a zombie came out with a wrench and had some of his intestines hanging out Jeffery shot him once with the shotgun he went flying backwards into the wall Jeffery walked back over to the computer there was a icon that said delta labs security access he clicked on that the door panel turned green and said general access Jeffery walked threw the door a plasma creature walked around the corner it screamed Jeffery shot but there was no loud bang just a small click he ran back to the reception and crouched under the desk and fumbled with the box of bullets in his pocket finally he was able to reload his gun in time after his gun was reloaded he stood up and shot twice the creature flew off the desk Jeffery stood up in terror and walked back to the hallway to find nothing except blood and dead scientist Jeffery walked into the room that said BETRUGERS MAIN OFFICE there was a computer sitting on a large metal desk it had all the names of the workers on it and there was a check next to the ones that were dead. Jeffery shot the computer suddenly evil laughter filled the room Jeffery was going to go insane!! He was stuck in a base on mars and for all he new he was the only one alive if he had DR. Betruger in front of him helpless he would be sure that he would be getting a taste of his own medicine he would be laying on the floor gasping for air and mercy but Jeffery new that this would never happen if he just stood around dreaming in fact he would probably end up dead like all the others Jeffery would have to work if he wanted anything at all to happen he decided to find a working administrator computer and see what Betruger was interested in most and then he would find what room that was in and see if he was there. Jeffery walked to the admissions office and looked for the computer room Jeffery tried to find one that wasn’t shot out or wasn’t covered in blood he eventually came to a computer that was still plugged in but was lying on the ground it was already logged in so he checked out Betrugers files and noticed that he spent most of his time in the portal test lab and that he was becoming more strict about when people could come in and cutting peoples hours back and even firing people for no reason. Jeffery thought this was strange even if this man was a lunatic

This is something i've ben working on...what do you think of it. (easy 10pts)?
Your first sentence really dragged me in. So I took the time to read the whole thing. I felt that it was really descriptive and filled with imagery. I really enjoyed it.
Reply:wow thats long
Reply:Um excuse me....Easy 10 points ?
Reply:Wow Mars you say lol, I like the Plasma balls..
Reply:Uuuuuuuummmmmmmmmmm, Yea.......... I Pretty Much Just Scrolled Down 2 "Answer This Question" And........... Yea. Umm, I See U Did A Lot Of Work. Somebody Will Read It Thoroughly (no offense)




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